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Parental Stress Is a Public Well being Difficulty, Says US Surgeon Common


Parents in the U.S. are collectively stressed out and burned out—and it’s officially a public health issue, says Surgeon General Vivek Murthy, MD, in a new advisory released Wednesday called Parents Under Pressure. This fact isn’t news to most parents (including me, whose toddlers are currently circling me, alternating demands for snacks and to “watch me!”). But it is news that our mental and physical exhaustion is finally being acknowledged on such a national stage, with Dr. Murthy calling for tangible support that goes beyond platitudes.

Dr. Murthy—a father of two himself—is responsible for identifying public health threats and providing guidance on how to solve them. Since taking office, he’s rallied the country behind responses to the Zika virus, opioid crisis, and America’s loneliness epidemic (the latter of which earned him a spot in Well+Good’s 2024 Changemakers issue).

Now, Dr. Murthy is turning the spotlight to the mental health and well-being of parents. “The work of parenting is essential,” he wrote in the advisory, “not only for the health of children but also for the health of society.” The report continues: “The stresses parents and caregivers have today are being passed to children in direct and indirect ways, impacting families and communities across America. Yet in modern society, parenting is often portrayed as a less important, less valued pursuit. Nothing could be further from the truth.”

These parenting challenges have always been present, but the emphasis on parents’ mental health is especially crucial right now, the advisory states, due to modern-day stressors that previous generations of caregivers didn’t face. “These [stressors] include the complexity of managing social media, parents’ concerns about the youth mental health crisis, and an epidemic of loneliness that disproportionately affects young people and parents, just to name a few.”

And there’s more: Parents today both work more hours and spend more time caring for their kids than parents did in the past. So it’s no wonder, then, that nearly half of parents say their stress is completely overwhelming most days, according to a 2023 report by the American Psychological Association.

“Something has to change,” Dr. Murthy wrote in a guest essay published Wednesday in The New York Times. “It begins with fundamentally shifting how we value parenting, recognizing that the work of raising a child is crucial to the health and well-being of all society. This change must extend to policies, programs and individual actions designed to make this vital work easier.”

Specifically, Dr. Murthy continued, this means more financial support for families, paid time off for parents, affordable child care, reliable mental health care services, and safe community spaces where kids can play and parents can connect with one another.

The policy changes Dr. Murthy laid out are ultimately in the hands of the government (so make sure to vote this November!). But change can happen on a personal level, too, he wrote in the Times essay: “Too often, when someone is struggling, we wait for an invitation to help, or perhaps we worry we don’t have anything of value to offer. Simply showing up can make all the difference in the world to another person,” continued Dr. Murthy. “As hard as it is, we must learn to view asking for help and accepting help as acts of strength, not weakness.”

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