When you’re in a romantic relationship, you are most likely to think that those feelings will remain the same. Unfortunately, people can change for a variety of reasons that result in a breakup whether married, living with someone or just steadily dating. Afterwards, you could be left devastated, trying to figure out why your significant other needed to leave you. If you intend to move forward after a painful breakup healing to get over your loss, then you may find these coping strategies helpful.
Coping Mechanisms for Heartbreak
We often tend to blame ourselves for why the breakup occurred. Were we not exciting or beautiful enough that brought it on? Then again, maybe you’re wondering if dealing with the responsibilities and daily rigor of family life caused what used to be a spontaneous relationship to fizzle out due to his boredom. You keep crying and focusing on why he left, thinking if only you were more observant to see the slight change in his attitude the breakup never would have happened. However, this attitude is self-destructive and only will prolong the suffering while doing nothing for your mental state. Instead, finish grieving and get it out of your system. The important thing is to not continue dwelling on why the relationship ended if you hope on healing faster after a breakup. You need to focus on the future because the past is the past.
Though we can believe it was real love, but was it really the type of love you needed? Think about how easily or not your significant other left can clue you in.
A breakup could also be another chance to alter your future. Perhaps, you married at a too young age and never had the opportunity to explore the career that you left on hold or start is just one example. You have a fresh start ahead for meeting new people and one could be more ideally suited to your personality, interests, goals in life, etc. for a happier future as a couple.
There will be times when we think we’re over the breakup when something reminds us of the relationship. It can be something as simple as finding a scrapbook of the two of you or some love letters or dried flowers that you didn’t remember saving that brings the painful memories back. This is not a setback, but happens randomly when least expected because healing after a breakup takes time when trying to change your mindset.
As shattering to our self-confidence that breakups can be, they also can serve as a learning experience to become better and wiser people. Life is too short to waste in misery when the right love can be out there so be ready to see it.
Remember, healing takes time, but it’s possible. We’re stronger than we think.
